Showing posts with label sorrow. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sorrow. Show all posts

Thursday, September 15, 2011

93

The sorrow so much easier to write
Humans obsessed with the pain in their souls
Happiness just an overlooked feeling
Weak hearts broken so much they can't survive
Joy is something we have long forgotten.

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Sunday, August 7, 2011

Catullus 85

An experiment with Catullus' famous poem. Fitting memorial for what today is to me.

Original
odi et amo. quare id faciam, fortasse requiris?
nescio, sed fieri sentio et excrucior.

Literal translation
I hate and I love. Why do I do this, perhaps you ask?
I do not know, but I feel it happening and I am tormented.

English verse
Hate and love felt. Why do so, is perhaps asked?
Reason isn't known, but it is felt and I am tormented.

Spanish
Odio y amo. porque hago eso, sera que preguntas?
No se, pero lo siento y estoy tormentado.

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Sunday, July 3, 2011

91

I have learned regret
What I wanted was so small
Yet I have lost it

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Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Over the Hills

Found a very old poem of mine, thought to post it here.

Over the Hills
Over the hills and far away,
I march to meet my end.
The arena of battle is my destination,
to the field of death I am sent.
I have no one waiting for me at home,
I have no one who loves me worrying.
Since there is nothing for me in this world,
I have nothing to live on for.
In this battle to which I march,
I will care not for Old Grim's smile.
Over the hills and far away,
I embrace my bitter destiny.

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Thursday, November 18, 2010

89

Tears come unbidden
The Grief never lets me go
The Knight of Mourning

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Friday, August 27, 2010

Hegemon's Seven Swords

A lifetime since Pride gave birth to the Hegemon.
White kan-dao, Imperator.
Pride incarnated.
Justice of the King.
The sole ruler of the people creates a world for them.

A lifetime since Pride gave birth to the Hegemon.
Black kan-dao, Kshtriyani
Gentle other half.
Loss of idol.
The ideals and dreams of the innocent gives the people hope.

A lifetime since Pride gave birth to the Hegemon.
Reversed blade, sakabato Fukei
Painful mercy.
Punishment without death.
The stern teachings of a guardian educate the people.

A lifetime since Pride gave birth to the Hegemon.
Flawless steel, katana Gekkabijin.
Lonely moonlight.
Solitude of transience.
The beauty of sad evanescence grants the people appreciation.

A lifetime since Pride gave birth to the Hegemon.
Serbian blade, schiavona Caudillo.
Fearless warlord.
Inspiration by example.
The model of the hero inspires the people.

A lifetime since Pride gave birth to the Hegemon.
Ancient memory, gladius Dignitas.
Valued possession.
Legacy of honor.
The name of the sovereign defines the people.

A lifetime since Pride gave birth to the Hegemon.
The black sword, Desrona
Truest mind.
Origin of birth.
The mind at the beginning binds the people to the vision.

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Monday, July 26, 2010

Inner World, (?)End

Simple little writing prompt I put before myself. Short version? Manifest an inner world and override reality.

Inner World, (?)End
My eyes are closed. There is no need to look outward. Or should I say inward? This is not the world that people know. You could say that such a world cannot exist anywhere. The weather is not set. It can change in the blink of an eye. Sometimes, it is an arid desert where nothing can grow, a desiccating wind the sole accompaniment to the immolating sun. Others, it is a blizzard without let that covers everything within this land under the snow, allowing no one the possibility to advance or retreat. The snow will capture, freeze, and slowly...bury.

It is desert now. I sit... I rule alone in my inner world. I have imposed my will on reality, bending it to the shape of my true vision. True....? I'm not sure. It is true that I have reshaped everything that falls into my territory into my vision. My territory is endless; it lies beyond the horizon. Even if the true world seeks to reject my inner world, it must bow down so long as my will continues.

I open my eyes. This landscape is very familiar to me. Dotting the landscape like tombstones are familiar shapes. I don't know how many times I've drawn them. They're always there. There's more of them each time I bring forward my inner world. How many broken ideals have been forged into something new here? How many dead dreams have been painfully scrapped?

I wonder how many words I can use to describe the raw materials? Dreams, fancies, fantasies, ideals, hallucinations, delusions, illusions, wraiths. Specters. Fake. All of it is nothing but a dream. False dreams, broken ideals, crushed fancies, murdered fantasies. You can't escape my territory. No matter how you far you run, you'll see nothing but the end result of the raw material.

I slowly stand. To your left is steel with an undulating style. To your right, the simple elegance of a curve belies deadliness. Beyond that, steel of every type imagined and seen exist. My right hand reaches out and draws from the ground my favorite type of sword, the schiavona. If you're here in the desert, I'm sure you understand. The blizzard would have given you a peaceful demise, but here in the desert of my inner world...

You have entered the Field of Blades. Forged from false dreams, broken ideals, crushed fancies, murdered fantasies, each one of these swords is stronger than any mere mortal or his insignificant hope. Few can survive the despair embodied here. Even fewer can continue on with these manifestations of wounds and still feel the pain inside each sword.

That doesn't matter any longer. Here, I am King. The desert is unkind. My swords are forged from that harshness. It is irrelevant if you fight. Come, I will show you kindness.

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Friday, July 9, 2010

87

Someone misses you
Their pain is more than soul deep
They mourn lost futures

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Saturday, July 3, 2010

86

Haiku structured stanzas strung together. I think I managed to keep the spirit of the haiku even as I told a longer story. For things I can't name, I'm just numbering. As the previous one was 85, this one is 86.

Precisely a year
I am like the Fisher King
The pain is still here

My dear assailant
Liar, traitor, beloved
Justice, please strike soon

What a bitter day
For I still bleed everywhere
Today it hurts more

Perhaps a good knight
Will be merciful today
And end this by force

No such mercy comes
I exist in sheer agony
Suffering alone

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Monday, May 17, 2010

A Familiar Silence

Today I saw you from afar
It was a first in much time
Or perhaps it was a last?

Even then, my mind was mute
Muzzled by a certain thing
I do not know what to think

A familiar silence
My mind did not heed my call
Twas another who acted

Treacherous eyes bore witness
Heart of glass that did whimper
Lungs that did not do their work

Unholy strain my chest did feel
My hand reached across that space
Untold agony of loss

Is the first last or last first?
Heart no longer speaks to heart
What could I say to reach you?

Could emotions bridge that gap?
Can you hear my heart screaming?
Or is your heart deaf to it?

I don't know what else to do
Now I pray for miracles
Will some kind god grant me one?

A familiar silence
An unbearable silence
In that place in me that's yours

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85

Three lines, seven beats. Super short to mimic ancient brevity. The counts are mostly to keep the mind distracted

I hate you and I love you
I do not know why this is
But I am tortured by it

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This work by Ronald Mina is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.