Showing posts with label pain. Show all posts
Showing posts with label pain. Show all posts

Thursday, September 15, 2011

93

The sorrow so much easier to write
Humans obsessed with the pain in their souls
Happiness just an overlooked feeling
Weak hearts broken so much they can't survive
Joy is something we have long forgotten.

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This work by Ronald Mina is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

Sunday, August 7, 2011

Catullus 85

An experiment with Catullus' famous poem. Fitting memorial for what today is to me.

Original
odi et amo. quare id faciam, fortasse requiris?
nescio, sed fieri sentio et excrucior.

Literal translation
I hate and I love. Why do I do this, perhaps you ask?
I do not know, but I feel it happening and I am tormented.

English verse
Hate and love felt. Why do so, is perhaps asked?
Reason isn't known, but it is felt and I am tormented.

Spanish
Odio y amo. porque hago eso, sera que preguntas?
No se, pero lo siento y estoy tormentado.

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This work by Ronald Mina is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Over the Hills

Found a very old poem of mine, thought to post it here.

Over the Hills
Over the hills and far away,
I march to meet my end.
The arena of battle is my destination,
to the field of death I am sent.
I have no one waiting for me at home,
I have no one who loves me worrying.
Since there is nothing for me in this world,
I have nothing to live on for.
In this battle to which I march,
I will care not for Old Grim's smile.
Over the hills and far away,
I embrace my bitter destiny.

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This work by Ronald Mina is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

Monday, November 1, 2010

88

Even the devil knows when he meets divinity
Only a fool fails to recognize a goddess
So what am I not to see holiness
Or at least a sacred person right beside me?

Guess this is what they mean
When they say too dumb too live
So since hell is too good for me
I better dread the payment for my sin

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This work by Ronald Mina is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

Monday, July 26, 2010

Inner World, (?)End

Simple little writing prompt I put before myself. Short version? Manifest an inner world and override reality.

Inner World, (?)End
My eyes are closed. There is no need to look outward. Or should I say inward? This is not the world that people know. You could say that such a world cannot exist anywhere. The weather is not set. It can change in the blink of an eye. Sometimes, it is an arid desert where nothing can grow, a desiccating wind the sole accompaniment to the immolating sun. Others, it is a blizzard without let that covers everything within this land under the snow, allowing no one the possibility to advance or retreat. The snow will capture, freeze, and slowly...bury.

It is desert now. I sit... I rule alone in my inner world. I have imposed my will on reality, bending it to the shape of my true vision. True....? I'm not sure. It is true that I have reshaped everything that falls into my territory into my vision. My territory is endless; it lies beyond the horizon. Even if the true world seeks to reject my inner world, it must bow down so long as my will continues.

I open my eyes. This landscape is very familiar to me. Dotting the landscape like tombstones are familiar shapes. I don't know how many times I've drawn them. They're always there. There's more of them each time I bring forward my inner world. How many broken ideals have been forged into something new here? How many dead dreams have been painfully scrapped?

I wonder how many words I can use to describe the raw materials? Dreams, fancies, fantasies, ideals, hallucinations, delusions, illusions, wraiths. Specters. Fake. All of it is nothing but a dream. False dreams, broken ideals, crushed fancies, murdered fantasies. You can't escape my territory. No matter how you far you run, you'll see nothing but the end result of the raw material.

I slowly stand. To your left is steel with an undulating style. To your right, the simple elegance of a curve belies deadliness. Beyond that, steel of every type imagined and seen exist. My right hand reaches out and draws from the ground my favorite type of sword, the schiavona. If you're here in the desert, I'm sure you understand. The blizzard would have given you a peaceful demise, but here in the desert of my inner world...

You have entered the Field of Blades. Forged from false dreams, broken ideals, crushed fancies, murdered fantasies, each one of these swords is stronger than any mere mortal or his insignificant hope. Few can survive the despair embodied here. Even fewer can continue on with these manifestations of wounds and still feel the pain inside each sword.

That doesn't matter any longer. Here, I am King. The desert is unkind. My swords are forged from that harshness. It is irrelevant if you fight. Come, I will show you kindness.

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This work by Ronald Mina is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

Saturday, July 3, 2010

86

Haiku structured stanzas strung together. I think I managed to keep the spirit of the haiku even as I told a longer story. For things I can't name, I'm just numbering. As the previous one was 85, this one is 86.

Precisely a year
I am like the Fisher King
The pain is still here

My dear assailant
Liar, traitor, beloved
Justice, please strike soon

What a bitter day
For I still bleed everywhere
Today it hurts more

Perhaps a good knight
Will be merciful today
And end this by force

No such mercy comes
I exist in sheer agony
Suffering alone

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This work by Ronald Mina is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

Monday, May 17, 2010

A Familiar Silence

Today I saw you from afar
It was a first in much time
Or perhaps it was a last?

Even then, my mind was mute
Muzzled by a certain thing
I do not know what to think

A familiar silence
My mind did not heed my call
Twas another who acted

Treacherous eyes bore witness
Heart of glass that did whimper
Lungs that did not do their work

Unholy strain my chest did feel
My hand reached across that space
Untold agony of loss

Is the first last or last first?
Heart no longer speaks to heart
What could I say to reach you?

Could emotions bridge that gap?
Can you hear my heart screaming?
Or is your heart deaf to it?

I don't know what else to do
Now I pray for miracles
Will some kind god grant me one?

A familiar silence
An unbearable silence
In that place in me that's yours

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85

Three lines, seven beats. Super short to mimic ancient brevity. The counts are mostly to keep the mind distracted

I hate you and I love you
I do not know why this is
But I am tortured by it

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This work by Ronald Mina is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.